I don't know why our adoption is taking soooo long.
I don't know why my three beautiful children have to stay in a boarding school and grow older every day without us.
I don't know why we have a court date that will most likely be changed and cause more delays.
I don't know why we have had money stolen away from the good things it was intended to do.
I don't know why we have been told soooo many lies.
I don't know why.
But what I do know... is that God is faithful.
I know that in the midst of this adoption taking so long, a desire in my heart has grown to help other older children find families and avoid the pain we have been through.
I know that even though my children are not with me, God takes care of them. He has proven this countless times.
I know that He is control of our court date.
I know that the money we have had stolen has made us determined to do the things God is calling us to do through our own project.
I know that through everything... God has turned evil intentions and brought about good.
I don't know why God thinks I can handle any of this... the adoption or this project. It is humbling... and scary... and exciting.
I do know that God is moving and directing and providing. I know that He will accomplish great things.
Sometimes I just need to write it down... to remember all that He has already done. So on the days where "I don't know" creeps up and trys to drag me down... I can look back and remember His faithfulness.
He IS good... and He loves me. This I know.